How to keep your sanity in this new normal…
Well, here we are on day 45,623 of quarantine. And the novelty of it all is wearing off. Here in Spain I’m spending a lot of time doing Instacart orders for my parents, figuring out homeschooling, and wondering when I’m ever going to be able to fly home again. In my last post I talked about the grief we feel that our normal has flown out the window. And so quickly. With so little warning for most of us. It just came up and smacked us upside the head, and here we are, boom, stuck at home watching the economy collapse as we eat banana bread in our six-day-old leggings (which are getting more stretched out by the minute). So what is there to do in a time like this?
Well, here’s what I can say as someone who is not a professional, but who has dealt with two huge traumas in the form of a stillborn son ten years ago, and a bad accident that left me with permanent mobility issues in my right arm five years ago. So I shall impart my hard-won-sort-of-wisdom in the form of:
Heather’s Top Tips for Keeping Sane In Your New Normal.
- Find the things you love, and do them as much as possible. The things you go back to for comfort and warmth. For me, it’s bubblebaths, markers and pens, video games, and music. And I’m also not ashamed to admit that, when it comes to making myself feel better, I have some pretty awful artists I listen to. Peter Cetera is at the top of the list. His music makes me feel like a ten year old with no responsibilities, watching Karate Kid. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy, and I love it.
- Additionally, find the things that make you feel good, and do at least one daily. This is likely different than the things you love. I find that weeding makes me feel amazing. Being outside surrounded by growing things, the sun on my back, and the feeling of utter satisfaction I get when I pull out a huge weed and get all the roots. The thing is, I don’t really like weeding. My back hurts, I’m kind of afraid of all the snakes that I know are in the tall grass, and it’s tiring. But it makes me feel really accomplished after I’m done, and is a good form of low impact exercise.
Plus, I always get my 10,000 steps in each day. Do I love doing this? Not really. It’s boring being outside at 10pm walking laps around the house. I listen to podcasts or audiobooks, and look up at the stars, but it’s still not what I’d call a fun time. Still, it makes me feel really good, and so I continue doing it.
- Eat as healthy as you can. After losing my son, I went on a sugar binge. I stress ate chocolate bars, ice cream, marshmallows with peanut butter slabbed on them, you name it. And while it may have given me a short boost of dopamine, it wound up making my body feel tired, sluggish, and pretty disgusting. Not the way I needed to feel when I was also struggling with the whole “being awake and dealing with pain” thing. After my second miscarriage five months later, I made a commitment to eating healthy, and taking good care of myself physically, and I finally began to heal from the trauma. I went for long walks at the lake near our house, watching the flowers shoot up, and the leaves come back on the trees, and with each step I felt a little bit more like myself.
- Spend time in fresh air as much as possible. See above. I know that with lockdown rules this can be difficult, but wherever you can, try to get some sun. Vitamin D is a natural antidepressant, and the warmth of the sun will warm your heart.
- Be around living things as much as possible. Pets are present in the moment, and don’t get caught up in worry about the future, or regrets about the past. Flowers bloom whether you’re happy or not. Spend time each day pausing to snuggle with a cat, play with a dog, or putter in a garden. It will bring you back to the present, and give you a boost of love.
There you have it. My completely non-mental-health-professional, solely based on experience top tips for keeping sane in the new normal. What do you do to keep sane in this new season of life we’re in?
